misused mistakes

Sunday, August 24, 2003

its a sundae.as usual..i woke up early..hmm..not that early tho..roughly 8 plus den i rushed down to church for cell.den to service.yup..took a cab though and i picked him up at his house...alright lah..had an miscommunication with one of my church friend..but now its solved and done.
yup..well,went to eat lunch after service.den back in church for maths tuition.it sux man..i did the ACSI paper and it almost killed me~!man..it really did.i did 4 qns in lyk 1 hr plus?tats pathetic..and while talking a break,i realised tat i lacked of foundation in maths tts why im doing it so slowly.i dunno when to apply formulas and stuff...darn!so sucky rite?and my prelims r lyk nearing?!?!?!got so pissed cuz of tat stupid paper so i did SJI paper..did ony the first qns.haha...how stupid and dumb can i be?haha...well,im slow in maths so must do the easiet qns first..used to find maths interesting last time..but now,cuz im not exposed to such tough qns...as a result,i dun lyk maths..totally no interest in it..now,its hard to get the interest back..sigh..sad case eh?....prelims prelims prelims!ahhhh -screams- fearing for tat dae to come...
anyway,think im jus mad nw...yuppers!well,after tat,he send me all the way home to my house bus stop..so sweet eh..cuz usually he'll jus send me halfway lyk at bishan interchange..hee...yah..he send me all the way home cuz we cant meet almost the whole wk..cuz hes skl got night classes...yup..i think its so cool...study at night in skl..but it'll be hard for me to go home...yah...anyway..so tired now..gonna slp soon..another dae of skl tml..sigh...ciaoz~

my ramblings at 10:23 PM

Saturday, August 23, 2003

darn..im so tired.jus came back from skl...had chem practical todae.kinda boring though..went skl jus for tat pathetic practical..but its worth it.saw the band falling in todae.well,quite ok...not tat smart but the volume is there.din visit my section..cuz was late for lesson.sorry.some other day...
ltr im gonna meet josh(him) for lunch den gg church.oh man..im damn it tired..why man?feel lyk some pig..maybe an ultimate one...well...shall stop blogging now..maybe i'll blog ltr again in th e night.
a few words to say to my percussion section...dunno if u guys will see this..but i'll jus do it here... yah...
i noe u guys r having a hard time...but whatever it is..jus work hard and be united...i noe u guys din play well yest for the CIP...cuz u all play the wrong piece..next time be more alert..cant afford to play the wrong piece k?pls work hard and im sure u guys will rise up...be the best section in STCMB ok?promise me...love u guys always..miss u all! ...

my ramblings at 10:39 AM

Friday, August 22, 2003

dunno wad to say to blog.sigh..everything is so cock up.exams r coming and many problems r bothering me.i might seem happy on the outside.but not the inside.i might look happy..and keep laughing..but inside me is not..inside me is crying...i put on a mask cuz i noe it'll affect my friends around me if im sad...sigh...jus cant list out all my problems cuz they r too many to say.my prelims r coming up...cant seem to concentrate..jus feel lyk giving up on my o levels cuz im totally not prepared for it...feel lyk such an stupid idiot...well..life has been dull for me now...not cuz of him but friends around me...mostly juniors...and some other stuff which i dun wish to say..
not in gd terms with so many ppl...dun even noe wad to do..feeling so sad to even wanna resolve the prob..well,i'll be graduating soon oso.but my friends asked me to cherish those ppl u have now if not you'll regret...sigh..maybe its jus me..
anyway..jessica..dun noe if you'll read my blog cuz u din link me in ur blog...i find tat we've drifted..we dun even talk in skl..nv sms..and letter i haven reply u cuz im busy n having problems..think we've drifted a lot..i dunno if u sense it...
sigh..dun feel lyk blogging now..bye...no mood..

my ramblings at 10:18 PM

Tuesday, August 19, 2003

sigh.had an tiring todae.stupid.see some ppl i dun wish to see though.hmm...i see ppl i dun wish to see everydae though.it really affected me though.couldnt concentrate doing my maths mock exam.not only tat.i was too tired to do it.and my brain lyk shut down.nothing seem to be working so i did whatever i can.i cant be so selfish to blame those who i dun wish to see anyway.prob its jus me.

aiyah..im so hungry now.suppose to have a happy dae todae cuz its the 8th month with HIM.but it was ok when i met him.by then,i was feeling much better.gave him the folded hearts,test tube,letter,heart shape sweet and macaroni alphabets.he told me he like it..yah..and he gave me this simple thingy lah.he pasted all our pics we took together den wrote something..its something small but sweet.yah...and i was angry when i went home with him cuz this grp of ITE girls and boys..1 girls is a butch.den i dunno how did she start.but i think she saw me and she purposely said it out loud..say...err...nowadays many convent skl got so many bitches.wad lah...stc,tp,st nicks,kc..sjc..everything..i was lyk WTH!i got so damn angry.and she was lyk looking at me!i was so angry till i bang the glass panel on the bus?!its really damn wad man..so agitated when i hear them saying it...u noe..imagine u din do anything wrong and ppl jus say something unpleasant abt u...shes obviously talking abt me cuz i was d only convent girl on the bus!shrugz man!argh..till now im angry!he was oso angry and wanted to scold..but he controlled.but acutally,i was angrier.he kept asking me to relax cuz i kept banging the seat and the glass panel...oso din do anbything wrong..i meant...come on..she herself is a bloody btuch..issit anything better than a BITCH?!and for goodness sake,im not a BITCH!i guess tt butch dunno wads a bitch...shld have told her the meaning.she haven seen...a real bitch before...bloody chenna baba..speak in chinese one...sigh..dun give a great damn deal to this sort of ppl..nvm...hope i wont see her again..if not...she'll get it.

aiyah..may ppl r going away..drifting..some dun even noe we're drifting..sigh..close to my prelims and many probelms start occuring...sigh..dunno why...argh....WTH...going off now lah...and heard percussion section having problems...ah...dunno wads wrong lah..sigh....

my ramblings at 10:39 PM

Thursday, August 14, 2003

todae was a tiring day!sigh.was tired cuz i din reallie slp the dae before...din slp cuz something was bothering me.had a arguement with him.it really sux.but now kinda ok alr.i dun wanna live in such misery n i wanna be ok with him.i did something for him cuz i felt bad.he was upset with me.well..jus wanna tell u im reeally sorry for wad ive said to u..i was jus too angry tts why i said such harsh words.though u alr forgive me,but still..im feeling guilty.yah..i will change for the better.u must noe this dear..everybody have their own habits.lyk u,u have bad habits.i accept u for who u r...cuz i noe..ur not out there to please everyone.yah...

annyway,nothing really happened in skl todae.ms nora din come again..as usual..shes lyk so slack.our prelims coming alr and she still can absent herself frm skl..im scared for my bio man..den suppiah din come for accounts..yah..after skl went out with daph den met mz..stupid ah soh or whatever TYPICAL singaporean...kept staring at me!so shithead can??!i was so fed up..same goes to daph.cuz i was carrying my canvas.and me,daph and mz sat at the back sit.den i put my canvas inside so 3 of us took up the whole sit.den the lady came up,saw my canvas n i told her abt it..she said, "can u move in abit?"oh....wth...i cant even move in..den she gave me tat wth face!feel lyk slapping her.its not lyk i dun wan her to sit?!come on lor...keep looknig at our socks..why..wanna lodge a Complain?go lah!we din do anything wrong...shit u ...gorge out ur eyes man!eyes so big...kuku neh neh!

nothing much..den when we were going hm...i suggested this stupid thingy lah..its lyk we;re not suppose to talk..only use hand signs..and whoever talks,treat lunch nxt wk..den mz talk!haha..mz...treat lunch ah..hahaha..will be waiting one.haha...

oh..this somebody is ignoring me..or should i sae...avoiding me..if ur too shy to come up to me and sae hi,den forget abt the friendship oir wadsoever...told u many times n its abt the same pt..u still dun get it..u mk me lose hope in u till now i dun feel lyk even seeing u..i mean lyk..wad r u trying to do?if u dislike me,u can always come up to me n tell me straight in my face...throughout the yrs,ive been cherishing u...but r u doing the same as me?or r u denying?if u r..i cant stop wad ur mind is thinking.y must u act dao towards me when u see me?oh..dun sae u din see me..cuz i noe u did...ah..i cant be bothered with u..i might hurt u or wadeva..but i dun give a big damn deal..cuz im sick and tired of this nonsense..wth..its not a playing game here..if u wanna play this game,im so sory..u chose the wrong person..cuz im not one who likes playing this kinda stupid and childish acts...

so mood out now...going nw...having headache now...life is nv ever happy for me.even if it is,its seldom.i might seem happy..but i hold back all my emotions.i dun lyk showing it...cuz i noe tat if i show it..it will affect the ppl around me...

my ramblings at 9:55 PM

Wednesday, August 13, 2003

sigh...its a damn sad day todae.real sad one.still cant believe it..ahh..sigh..maybe its jus meant to be for me.but why me?been tearing/crying abt it..sigh.... c6(u) why?sigh...dunoo...try to get over it but i cant..its sort of affecting me...cuz i cant believe the fact..sigh..sux...-cries-

pam's birthdae todae.went down town to eat sushi wit daph,drea and YR...and obviously the birthdae girl pam.yah..im so sorry yah..cuz todae was lyk a bad dae for u..took backchinese results den not feeling so gd...anyway,all the best for ur ss prelims.yup...

dun understand why some ppl r so irritating.they jus gets onto ur nerves.these kinda ppl r some hypocrites..i shall call them tt...they always think they;re right n nothing else.is tat even the right way to carry out urself??to actually think ur a -------ur religion....r u trying to act holy or wad man...lyk wad ppl say,,practice wad u preached..r u practising?or r u jus saying it jus to act nice?if u r,pls dun act anymore.cuz theres no pt.cuz one way or another,we wont be nice to u back..wait longer if u wan to.cuz we mk up our mind.we rather go to a grp whos more happy go lucky than urs..all hypocrites and dunno wad with the exception of 1..pls think of urself first before judging others cuz u urself r doing the wrong thing...dun understand why ur so naive..cant be bothered anyway.since u wanna be lyk tt..nxt time u'll find tat all ur friends will be gone..den tats too bad for u..cuz u asked for it...

so tired now.needa call dear now...sigh...feeling so demoralised and sad..sigh...

my ramblings at 10:37 PM

my ramblings at 9:45 PM

my ramblings at 9:44 PM

Friday, August 08, 2003

my ramblings at 10:29 PM

Wednesday, August 06, 2003

testing

my ramblings at 10:32 PM